Why?

This this post is going to get really personal for me, I will not cry! I will not shed a single tear but it hurts.

I've already lost one parent in 2005 and that shook my world upside down. I survived with help of my family and my mom. Since the death of my dad I've seen my mom 4 times since 2005 the last was 2011. Due to her living in my home state of Oklahoma and myself moving to California, and she spent a couple of days with my kids and hubby. So ok, Reason I'm telling you this so my mom called me and told me she was flying to Southern California to do some stuff  with my aunt I don't talk to. So the hubby came up with a cool idea we would buy a ticket for her to fly up from San Diego to Northern California to spend the day with her grandkids and Me! She point blank said "NO".  The Shock wounded me it left me scratching my head?  So I told my oldest the 13yr old and he was really hurt by this. I told him what my siblings have been telling me for Years my Mother is selfish.
    So last week she calls me and tells ask me "guess where I am"? I was like California and she responds I'm at Sea-world  Then the next Freaking day she calls me and tells me she is at the San Diego zoo. And a day goes by but bold and behold here is another phone call she is at Knott's Berry Farm. I'm like cool mom that's awesome! Great uh-Huh sure ok! while I'm shaking my head still in disbelief!

         What is it with Mothers? I swear I will never do that to my kids or grandkids! On top of all this my Mother in-law hasn't seen the kids 9 months and she only spent the day with them. Don't they understand they are hurting my kids? Don't they understand it hurts us too? It kills me to have to explain it to my 7yr old. especially when her world evolved around them. It hurts to even mention how much it hurts my son these two women were his world.
         With my Mother living in Oklahoma I understand why she never got to see him play football or won't be at his Middle school Graduation but my Mother In-law lives only an hour away there should be no excuse. I'm not mad at her like she thinks I'm more hurt then anything she became a person I no longer could open up to, a person I could just call up and have a conversation with.
       She Divorced my Father In-law not her son's and daughter In-laws and NOT THE GRANDKIDS!
   Don't get me wrong my kids now have an amazing relationship with my Father In-law now. And my kids love going over there and spending the nights. My youngest always ask when is she going over there to help her 'buddy' out!

I'm sitting here typing this and still shaking my head I don't know what else to do?
With Mother's Day around the corner I really don't know how I feel about this day do I send them something or not?  All I know if I don't see someone at my son's Middle school promotion ceremony in June I honestly will make a really hard decision and I will stick to it!